EVERYBODY CANT GO

Everybody can’t go. For me, learning that was painful and took years. The whole concept about ‘loyalty’ was one of my core values and a part of my identity for as long as I remember. To me, being “loyal to my day 1s since day 1” was me being solid, and at those moments I never thought I idolized the idea way too much because frankly I didn’t even know what that meant.

Im a very passionate person. Through the course of my life, I’ve loved with passion, hated with passion, fought with passion. When I feel, it's deeper than the average person. When someone I cared about fell short of my expectations, it hurt me so bad I would stop talking to them forever. Because I was raised (and still am) principle driven, my fallouts were always justified in my mind. I did right by these people, I proved that I was down and didn’t get the same in return. Some of my fallouts ended in physical fights, because I was so hurt and just as hard as I could love you, I could say “fuck you” if you crossed me. Right is right, wrong is wrong, and in my eyes I was always right.

Fast forward to now, I have come to realize a few things about these experiences that have helped with my transformation. One, investing too much of myself into people - being loyal to a fault and wreaking havoc when I felt it wasn’t returned was a form of idolization. Time after time of devoting myself to a friend and then falling out because “they didn’t think like me” eventually led me to finally seeing that the only individual I needed to devote myself or expect anything from was God. I’ve said this before, but we as humans don’t owe each other anything, no matter how much you’ve done for them and what score your ego keeps from it.

Another thing that’s made an impact to my perspective was realizing that no two souls on this Earth think exactly alike. What may be the bonified truth to you could be questioned by others. The way we view things are molded by our own unique experiences and the value and lessons we gained from them.

The biggest thing I’ve learned after first realizing that I was idolizing loyalty, and that everyone has a complete mind of their own, is realizing that life is a series of seasons and chapters, and that includes people. Each stage of growth, you are becoming a new you. You are shedding old habits, old perspectives, and old people that once fit into what was. I used to still hold bitterness in my heart for the people I felt wronged me, but the fact is they were only meant for a season that God used to show me more about myself. Once I changed my perspective on loyalty, I refined it - I am loyal to whats now meaning I am committed to whatever is happening in my current season because I know elevation always comes from it. Now I am able to healthily and gracefully let go of anything and anyone that doesn’t serve the next me. Some experiences may be painful, but not taking it too personal and focusing on what God was trying to show you makes it okay to move on, with no love lost, honor, and grace for the people who were only operating to the best of their capability towards you during that season. Everybody can’t go, and it’s okay. Cherish the ones that advance with you, and learn to part with peace with the ones that don’t.

Hope this made sense and served as a positive reminder for your heart, and your life! Have a great rest of the week❤️ Until next time

Molly