It's DEFINITEY a process...

Hi Guys!

I know it’s been a while and I promised that I would keep it completely transparent. So to be quite transparent, lately I’ve been experiencing a transition that caused me to be at a complete loss for words. I’ve been trying to figure out the reason for my writers block that caused me to go awol, and what I discovered finally made sense. Originally, I had a whole plan for the timeline and direction I wanted to take with the “Owning Your Truest Self” publications… but I realized that was going against the idea of releasing control instead of just letting the words flow through me to speak to you. I started this publication to TRULY be a vessel in spreading a divine message, and most times those messages don’t come with a plan. So in correcting myself, please allow me to apologize for leaving you hanging! To talk to you about owning your truest self, it’s important that I stay in touch with mine so everything you read about will be authentic. This is another one of those moments where I am so glad I’ve done the work to uncover and get to know my true self, because I could sense that something was off. I know most writers would have ignored the feeling in order to get something out at the deadline, but I just couldn’t bring myself to force it. We all are living life day to day, and while a lot of it is routine, there are definitely times where unexpected events and feelings get thrown at you. So, a few gentle reminders for you….

1. Your feelings are valid.

Every single one of them. Whether you are resisting them, or they indicate something you need to work out within yourself, they are valid. They are for a reason. Take your time to feel what you feel and nothing else - bury yourself in it if you need too! But at some point, especially if you’re not used to doing so then perhaps you could take a step back and evaluate them. What aspect of your situation caused you to feel this way? You might ask yourself, “Why do I continue feeling this way?” It’s important to get to know yourself in this way to find the root of certain emotions that could be hindering your growth. You want to become you in your truest form! Without being scorned, jaded, or bitter, without feeling triggered and without having to use a defense mechanism. Even the smallest feelings and emotions have a reason, and having clarity about those reasons can help you make necessary changes to yourself or your environment. It can also help you determine what’s valuable to you so you can create more room for what serves you!

2. Get what you need.

When I go through any negative emotions, I make myself comfortable and I sit right down with them. Often times, I let them consume me. When I was going through the grief of losing Jai (my sons dad), I allowed myself to get as low as I needed to go. I remember in the first few weeks I would visit the cemetery every day and cry like a newborn baby. I’m not being dramatic, I would cry and wail so loud and I didn’t care who heard me. I cried until my eyes were swollen and raw, both nostrils were runny and had to gasp for air. I had to get my pain out. The realest quote I ever read about grieving the loss of a loved one was that the feeling felt like “love with no place to go”…. the way I embodied the pain from this heartbreak had to flow out in all different ways to make it physically bearable. This went on for a long time and I was literally just taking it day by day. I realize that the level that I chose to allow myself to suffer is extreme. But I also knew that whatever God was doing in my life to make this experience apart of it had to be processed fully to prepare me for the next part of my life. Never do you ever get over losing someone with death - it never gets better… but YOU get better. Something in me told me that if I would allow myself to get to my lowest point, then whatever was left could be built up as a solid foundation with no cracks within it. Get what you need for as long as you need.. What I found was by taking all the time I needed to sit with and process my emotions, I could understand and evolve around them more. It was almost as if my armor was being rebuilt in the strongest way… again to prepare me for what was next!

3. Be Unapologetic

Whatever it is that you feel inside that you need, go get that! It might be to leave texts and calls unanswered or unreturned. It might even be to eat, drink, or smoke your feelings away. I’m not telling you to go kill yourself doing any of these things, I’m telling you not to feel bad because you got what you needed in that moment. Be gentle with yourself. Become so self aware that you know what you need even if its temporary, and just let it be that. Not everything deserves an explanation. Remember that you owe no one anything. Technically you don’t even owe yourself, these are just choices that we decide to make.

4. Set your intentions

Your feelings are valid, you’re getting what you need, and you’re unapologetic about it. It sounds like you’re working through the starter kit of transparency on the road to owning your truest self! Now the key component to all of this is setting your intentions. Knowing what you want and how you intend on obtaining it will help justify all the nonsense you might experience while going through the process feeling what you feel, getting what you need, and not feeling bad about it. Note that you can design the intentions how you want. You can set one big end goal and then break it up into baby steps. Whatever you’re doing right now, whether it is apart of the process or apart of the change you want, make sure you set an intention right along with it. Even if you don’t even feel close to where you need to be, that intention will rest in the subconscious part of your mind until it works its way up to the front lines. Know that it could possibly take years of work, but simply having your intentions established will have a way of keeping you grounded and serve as a magnetic force for things to occur to push you towards it. To those watching from the outside, it may look like you’re just all over the place. But you know what you’re working towards, and sometimes it won’t be a straight path… let your intentions be be the guide.

I hope this helps you in whatever you may be facing today or tomorrow. We are all out here just trying to figure it out and knowing that there’s someone out there who’s experienced similar things and have taken the time to figure out and apply the formula will provide some insight for you. Please feel free to reach out with conversation or feedback. I will be praying for you! Until next time.

Molly Tieng